Delayed.

I am extremely disappointed about missing fall term.
Im just trying to figure out how to channel all this motivation into something productive until spring term. I don't know how to go back to being a non-student for 4 months.
I have so much riding on getting my degree.
I am no longer amused by being a penny pincher; it's not fun anymore. Ok, it was never fun, but I had some strange tolerance; knowing it wouldn't be forever.
But now, honestly, I feel like it's going to be forever.
I realize that a 4 month delay isn't the end of the word.
I'm just really disappointed.

I feel like I've been put to the test at every turn.
There seems to be two settings for getting things done;
manual or automatic.
I'm definitely stuck on manual.
Everything that was supposed to be taken care of with the click of a magic cyber button (enrollment, records, financial aid) hasn't come through on it's own.
I've lived through real life groundhog days with some guy named Rico at student services, I've been in the storage rooms at the school-board, I've waited hours for five minute appointments. I've done everything I know how to do.
I just wish someone would cut me a break.

Yesterday, I thinking about the scripture "let patience have her perfect work."
I know asking for patience is a huge mistake because it comes through trials. I'm kinda past that stage already.
Knowing that patience already exists in me, I just have to let her do her thing. I just have to surrender.

I'm not there yet. I'm still angry and annoyed.
I'll try to post something uplifting when/if I ever get there.